Curiosity and Compassion
A friend of mine is hosting a bridal shower and is preparing a book of wisdom about marriage for the bride-to-be. She asked if I'd be willing to contribute a thought I had on what makes a strong marriage.
The first thing that came to mind was two words: curiosity and compassion.
These words have been my goal for more than just my marriage, but as a posture to hold when I may have any sort of difference of opinion or misunderstanding with anyone.
In a world that grows more connected each day, differences among people—whether cultural, ideological, or personal—are no longer distant concepts but part of our daily lives. Navigating these differences with grace and understanding requires two essential qualities: curiosity and compassion. These aren't just soft virtues; they are powerful tools for building bridges where walls might otherwise form.
Curiosity invites us to ask, “Why?” instead of jumping to conclusions. It encourages us to explore rather than judge, to listen rather than assume. When we meet someone whose background, beliefs, or behaviors are unfamiliar, curiosity allows us to see them not as threats, but as opportunities to learn. It shifts our mindset from defensiveness to openness, from fear to wonder. In this way, curiosity transforms difference from something divisive into something enriching.
But curiosity alone isn’t enough. It must be paired with compassion—the ability to see the humanity in others, even when we don’t understand them. Compassion softens our reactions. It reminds us that behind every perspective is a person shaped by their own experiences, struggles, and hopes. While curiosity helps us seek to understand, compassion helps us care. It allows us to treat others with dignity, even when we disagree.
Together, curiosity and compassion form the foundation for meaningful connection. They help us engage with difference not as a problem to be solved, but as a reality to be embraced. In doing so, we create space for growth—not only in our relationships with others, but within ourselves. We become more thoughtful, more empathetic, and more aware of the richness that diversity brings.